Snapshots of Life

Those who have spent even a little bit of time with me will probably not be surprised to hear that I have taken quite a few pictures in the time I've been here. This post has no particular purpose other than sharing some of them. Enjoy!

"Everybody's got a water buffalo..." Ok, not quite, but there are quite a few!

Up on the helipad. I've started having a little worship service of my own up there on Sunday mornings, and it's lovely.

Charlotte and I are prepared to go hunting for Matilda, the cockroach lurking somewhere on my shelves. We were successful! The official victory belonged to Charlotte, the Raid, and the shoe, but I did help. :)

The river after a very heavy rain

The house behind ours

A picture of pictures! This is one of the walls in my room. It's so great to be reminded of the promises of Scripture and to see the faces of those I love everywhere I look.

I got three packages and some letters on the last supply flight! Quite fun, to say the least. :)

Sunset... the colors were a bit brighter, but one must do the best one can with the camera one has. 

The neighbors dog had puppies! The kids and I named them after the queens and explorers we've been studying in history: Magellan, Queen Isabella, Cartier, Queen Elizabeth, and Leif Erickson

 Leif is my favorite. :)

Kyle and his friend have been building a very impressive fort!

Passing by a rice field on an expedition to acquire more bamboo

Harvested corn

Me, Sophia, Charlotte, Jenna, and Jojo, the Talbot's dog

Kyle getting bamboo, while the girls and I waded in the river

Jenna in the river

Me, Hala, Charlotte, Sophia, and Jenna talking with Mom, Dad, Zach, and Kirby over Skype. Definitely a memorable experience!

We play games all the time around here. During this particular game of Life I had 7 kids, breaking my personal record of 6.

I hope you enjoyed this rather random post! I've been here over 2 months now, which is officially the longest I have ever been away from home. These pictures give you an idea of some of the fun I've been having. Though there have been hard times too, God has been faithful through it all, and is slowly working to accomplish much in my heart. Following Him is always an adventure!

Faith and Victory

For the last month, I have been slowly working my way through 1 John. So good! Everything I've read goes right along with what God has been teaching me anyway (coincidence? I think not!) and I pray that these lessons stick. I don't want to simply read and appreciate it, I want to, by God's grace, live it. Anyway, I'm nearly at the end of the book now, and I wanted to share something that stood out to me when I read the beginning of chapter 5 a few days ago.

"For this is the love of God, that we keep His commandments. And His commandments are not burdensome. For everyone who has been born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world- our faith. Who is it that overcomes the world except the one who believes that Jesus is the Son of God?" (1 John 5:3-5)

There is so much to that, but what struck me that particular morning was what John doesn't say. He doesn't say that the victory that has overcome the world is our perseverance, our endurance, our obedience, our willingness to stand and fight in the battle... it's our faith. We are called to do all of those things, but that's not where our hope of victory lies, because it's ultimately not about what we do. Faith is the key to overcoming because our faith is in Him. The point isn't faith in and of itself. After all, I could believe with all my heart that I could jump off a cliff and fly, but my belief wouldn't somehow magically produce results (although I have to admit, that would be pretty cool!) It's the object of our faith that matters, and faith in Christ plants our feet firmly on a Rock that cannot be moved.  As we persevere, obey, fight, and seek to run faithfully the race He has marked for us, may our confidence rest not in our ability to stand, but in His ability to keep us standing. If He is our hope of victory, we will indeed overcome!


In other news, while it may not feel like fall here, at least our schoolroom door is festive! The girls and I end each week of school with a craft project, and this was our project last week.

Home

  Yesterday morning (which was Saturday night back in NC) I had the privilege of being present at my dear friend Tori's 16th birthday party via Skype. It was a surprise for her, and while I pray it was a blessing, I realized almost as soon as I got on that the one receiving the greatest blessing was me. For about a half hour, I got to "be with" many of my very closest friends, most of whom I haven't gotten to talk to in nearly two months. It meant the world to me, and I could feel their love even though I was only looking at a blurry image on a computer screen.

  I have not been homesick too much, but after saying goodbye I ached so, so deeply. Truly, I am happy here. But I do miss home. I miss my family, CYT, and all of those I love dearly, and I've been feeling it a bit more strongly this week. Right now I am reading Hind's Feet on High Places for the third time- it's one of my favorites. Towards the beginning, the Shepherd, who represents Jesus, says, "If you would know love, you must know pain too." It's true. The reason why it hurts is because the community I have back home is a gift from God, so full of His love. This ache is a testament to the beauty of what He has given me. Hurting is not a bad thing, but I don't want to focus on it. My real home is not North Carolina. It's in Him. Home was only beautiful because He was in it, and He has promised never to leave nor forsake me. This pain is His gift to me, an opportunity to find that He really is enough. I pray for the strength to continually choose to rejoice in Him, for He is good.

"The Lord is my Shepherd; I shall not want."
Psalm 23:1

The Lock

On the door inside my room here in the village, I have a drawing of a padlock, along with the words "And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that having all sufficiency in all things at all times, you may abound in every good work." (2 Cor. 9:8) written above. Why a lock? Because a lock has become to me a powerful reminder of something vital in my walk with Christ.
  Several years ago, while working on a CYT play, I was asked to do some team building exercises with one of the groups. Having no idea what to do, I prayed about it. By the time the evening arrived, God had given me the ideas I needed, including one I was quite excited about.
  After an activity involving a puzzle and a blindfold, I handed the girls a locked padlock, directing them to work together and get it open. They dived in with eager optimism, passing the lock around and tossing out suggestions. Some of their ideas were funny. Some were quite clever. All were wrong. I let them work at it for awhile (it was really quite amusing) and finally asked them to stop. "Do you think you can get it open?" I asked.
  Pause. "No."
  "You're right! You can't! But may I have it?" They handed it over and, turning the knob back and forth, I opened it easily. "So why was I able to open it?"
  "Because you knew the combination."
  "Exactly."
  Just like I gave them an impossible task in handing them that padlock, the task facing them in bringing the play together- memorizing, dancing, singing, conveying emotion, loving each other with the love of Christ- was impossible. At CYT we are amateurs trying to put together high quality theater, which provides plenty of opportunities to see God work. Even if they could have pulled something together, it never would have had the anointing of the Holy Spirit that we pray for. But though it was beyond their ability, it was not beyond the God who had given them that work to do in the first place. I also pointed out that, in order for the lock to be opened, they had to give it to me. I could have opened it the whole time; I would have, if they had asked me. But they had to let go, and place it in my hands. How foolish we must look, trying and trying in our own strength when the God who made the universe is waiting for us to yield control, so that He might display His mighty power on our behalf.
  There was one more thing I wanted them to see. "So the lock is open now. Would it make sense for you to go down and tell the others, 'Look, we got it open!'"
  "No."
  "Why?"
  "Because you did it," they answered.
  Seems pretty obvious. But how often do we cry out to God in desperation, then take the credit when He answers (in our hearts, if not with our words) as though we ourselves had done something grand?

In my life right now, I am facing situations which I know full well are utterly beyond my ability to navigate. More than that, Jesus Himself said, "Apart from me, you can do nothing." (John 15:5b) I can try and try, but the solution cannot be found within. It's not that I simply sit back and do nothing, for that is laziness. But only when I place my impossibilities in His hands in surrender and trust will I ever see those mountains moved. This simple illustration has had a profound impact on the way I view life. I don't know if the students remember, but I pray I never forget.
  

And So It Begins!

It is now Saturday, and we have made it through our first week of school! As my mom said, I guess I am now a second generation homeschool teacher. For months now I have prayed about teaching, and the first two and a half weeks in the village were spent in preparing. It was a daunting idea, and I knew I could never do it in my own strength. Now here I am, one week in, more convinced of that than ever. I can't! Even if I could get us through a school day, I couldn't help them really learn anything. On day one I prayed that Jesus would keep me depending on Him and not let me get too comfortable. I know it's only week one, but so far so good! I knew that there would be challenges, and I'm certainly able to see many of them right now. It will take wisdom, patience and endurance, but I know that all are found in Him. Amid questions and moments when I wonder how in the world this is going to happen, I find that I have joy in it. It's satisfying. I know that it's the work He has given me to do right now, and I'm truly happy. Real contentment and joy come from walking in His will. I want to seek His strength to be faithful in teaching with excellence, but more than anything, I am praying that as we go through each day, He will live through me to show these kids (who have come to mean so much to me) His love, which is patient, kind.... (1 Cor. 13) I want them to see Him in me. This is only the beginning of this adventure! Your prayers are appreciated more than I can say, and it means so much to know that there are many faithfully praying in the days ahead. 

And because blog posts are just more fun with pictures...

This is the school room in the very early stages of organization. Scary!

Here it is the day before school, posters all over the floor, and still in need of benches

Our little first grader, very excited to learn about planets!

One more sleep until school!

The posters are up, and it looks so nice! The one on the right is my favorite- it's like a mini thesaurus. Looking at it makes me realize how much I love words.

Students and teacher on our first day

Hard at work!

A misprint in the history workbook resulted in Hala cutting Leif Erickson in half. We all had a good laugh over that one. Good thing we have glue sticks!

We finished our week with our first art project. I think I had as much fun as the girls!

A Different Sort of Birthday

It's been quite the week! We started school on Monday, and Miss Lindy is really loving teaching, challenges and all. I'll post more about that soon, but right now I wanted to write about something else. Yesterday was my 22nd birthday. I don't usually post about things like that, but this was certainly a different sort of birthday, so I thought I'd share. 

I look back on the past year and can hardly wrap my mind around all God has done. It has been a year full of incredibly painful times and even more incredibly beautiful times. In this past year, my life has been turned upside down, and I feel pretty safe saying that it's been the most eventful year I've experienced thus far. But it has been a wonderful one, and I am in awe of His faithfulness through it all. 

My birthday itself really was lovely. While I did feel homesick in moments, I never felt alone. I've been here over a month, and the Talbots truly do feel like family. I was greeted first thing in the morning with birthday hugs from the girls, plus a kiss from Jenna. Hala and Charlotte each made me a sweet card, and Shannon made me a birthday cake. Later I sat by the nearby waterfall and watched as the kids swam after school, loving every moment of being outdoors and enjoying the amazing beauty that surrounded me (and today I actually went swimming myself!) One of the little guys in the village turned two on the same day, and evidently birthday parties for the kids are a big thing here. We went to his party for dinner, and though I couldn't really speak to anyone of course, it was great fun, and certainly a cultural experience! They sang happy birthday to him, along with an added verse- "May God bless you", which is a cultural thing. For me, it was a reminder to continue in prayer for these people who are in such desperate need of God's truth. I may not be able to speak it, but I can pray. Please be praying with me for these people, and for the Talbots as they are moving towards being able to communicate the gospel to them. After leaving the party, I came home to many wonderful messages and videos from the people I love so dearly back home, and got to talk with my mom and brother over Skype. When all was said and done, I was left so thankful, for truly, I am blessed beyond measure. 

Note Charlotte's addition in the corner. :)

Jenna has been helping make my birthday cake.. not that you'd ever notice.

Sophia, Charlotte, Hala, and Jenna- I really do love those girls!

Sweet cards from Hala and Charlotte

At the birthday party right before dinner

Self photography by Chuck

Macaroni, pancit, and nansilot- yummy!

This little guy shares my birthday!

The kids love it when you take their picture. I'd take one and show them, and they would all laugh and point and tease each other, and it made me laugh too. Each time they would say, "One more!"

Finally, I got in the "one more".

Poem- "With Joy"

"...I will offer in His tent sacrifices with shouts of joy; I will sing and make melody to the Lord." - Psalm 27:6b

I remember reading that years ago and being struck by the concept of sacrificing with joy. We may not sacrifice animals anymore, but we are called to be living sacrifices.The Websters 1828 dictionary defines sacrifice as "Offered to God upon an altar; destroyed, surrendered, or suffered to be lost." When we think of sacrifice, it's often with dread, fear, or reluctance, because we know that there is pain involved in laying something down. But here the psalmist is sacrificing with a song in his heart. Why? Because He loves the Lord. Because God has delivered him in his time of need. Because He has learned that there is nothing of greater worth than seeking Him, knowing Him, and being known by Him. I want to sacrifice with shouts of joy. This is something God placed on my heart this morning.

"With Joy"

This path is one of sacrifice,

A road with heavy cost.

We follow our dear Savior,

Who suffered on the cross.

Yet though this path brings sorrow,

It's no pathway of despair.

For as this world is stripped away,

We find our Jesus there.

How can a heart make melody;

Find joy in sacrifice?

By finding what we gain in Him,

The Pearl of greatest price.

A heart in love with Jesus

Can give without a qualm,

For though in pouring out, it aches,

It's filled with His sweet song.

Oh, may I walk this path He's set,

Cost me what it may.

May I place my trust in Him,

And trusting Him, obey.

"You have said, 'Seek My face." My heart says to You, ' Your face, Lord, do I seek.'" - Psalm 27:8

More Than I Can Handle

We've been in the village for a week and a half. It's definitely another world! When I look out the two screened windows in my room, I can see banana and coconut trees, pigs, chickens, roosters, a monkey tied up, water buffalo (feel free to sing the song- I certainly have!) laundry hanging, and small houses with grass or tin roofs. I sleep under a mosquito net, the roosters start crowing about 4 am or so, and keep going all day. The last week has been spent (in addition to playing games and so forth with the kids) cleaning and organizing the school room and planning for the school year.

So what has God been teaching me, you ask? (Ok, you might not be asking, but I'll tell you anyway.) Well, I'm on the other side of the world from home, I've spent a week and a half in a rural village in a foreign country with no internet (which means no contact with anyone back home), facing drawers with hiding cockroaches, a mountain of school books, and teachers manuals, and a year of teaching four children when I've never taught one subject before... yeah. There's been a whole lot of learning going on over here! Here's one thing though.

People often say that God won't give us more than we can handle. It sounds very nice and comforting, but the reality is that it's simply not true. He does give us more than we can handle because He wants us to depend on Him instead of looking within for the strength to handle it. The fact that He loves us doesn't mean that He will keep us from challenge, pain or difficulty. Rather, because He loves us, He wants us to learn to trust when we can't see, to find peace and joy in Himself, and to find that He really does give strength for the weary; that His grace really, truly is sufficient. He does give us more than we can handle, but He will never give us anything that He is not able to live through us to overcome.

I'll be honest, lately I've had way more than I can handle. There have been plenty of moments when I was stressed, overwhelmed, or lonely, and didn't know how I could keep going. In moments where I would normally go to my mom or a friend for prayer and perspective, I have been in a position where all I could do was cry out to God and trust that He is all He says He is. Again and again, I have cried out for wisdom, clarity, strength, peace, for Him to live through me and make me more like Him... It's been hard. It's been painful. But never once have I been forsaken or alone. In the times when I felt I couldn't hold on, He has been holding on to me. I've been learning, along with so many other things, faith. Trust. Hope in the One who can never fail. I'm learning that He really is enough, and no matter the cost, it's worth it.

I don't mean to sound like I've been falling apart the whole time- I certainly haven't! There have been wonderful times of laughter, fun, learning to fit into a new family, and experiencing many new things. Here are some pictures!

About to get on the helicopter

In the helicopter on the way to the village- it was amazing!

This was waiting for me in my room. Welcome to the tribe, Lindy!

Charlotte, my brave, loyal assistant in organizing/cleaning, and Ernie the cockroach. Ernie is no longer with us. Thanks Charlotte!

The school room- very definitely a work in progress.

Cockroach poop. The cockroaches in this drawer had been killed by the time I took this picture. So fun! haha

Somebody in the village found this bird and gave it to Kyle. Mom, I'm posting this for you.

A corner of the Talbot's house

Next Door

"Everybody's got a water buffalo..."

Kyle took me and Sophia on a village tour. This is the waterfall which, I believe, normally has much more water.

Learning to knit!

The school room, looking much better, but still a work in progress

School books!

Kyle working on his fort

One of the little girls in the village

Learning

This will be my last post for awhile, as we will soon be headed for parts unknown (aka the village) and once we are there, it will be probably at least a few weeks until I have internet access again. I just wanted to check in, let you know that I'm still alive over here (haha) and share a small bit of what God has been teaching me.

Honestly, there is so much that it's hard to sort it all out in my mind. I've been writing most of it down (and trying not to turn into a hermit in the process), but God is hard at work in my life. There is still so much of me left in me, but God is chipping away, shaping, pruning, refining through fire.... whatever you want to call it, though I really am happy and really do love it here, it hurts. I want to love Him so much that I can say with all of my heart that nothing matters as long as He is glorified. I'm having to preach truth to myself constantly, because in the flesh that is not how I view life, and it is easy to focus on sacrifice, loneliness, hardship, difficulty, confusion, discomfort... and the list goes on. (not that things are even that hard, just harder than anything I've faced before.) But to focus on those things is self-pity, and self-pity is sin. In Philippians 1 Paul is in chains, circumstances far beyond anything I'm facing (obviously!) yet his joy shows through his writing in a way that's impossible to miss, because through it all, Christ is being glorified, which is so clearly the desire of his heart. His eyes are totally off of himself and focused on Christ first, and as an outflow of that, those around him. I am not like that, but I want to be, and if being brought to that point means being cut off from internet, (which only matters because it means being cut off from those I love) for awhile, and being so far from home for much longer, then so be it. No matter what I lose, even temporarily (for truly, this is so temporary!) I can never lose the only Thing I really need. And whatever the cost, it is worth it to learn that. I know that in my head, but He is faithfully teaching my heart. He disciplines those He loves, and I know that He loves me. And that is all I need. I am nothing, but I serve a mighty God who is able to use me in spite of me.

Pray that I will have a heart that says always "Be Thou my vision, O Lord of my heart. Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art". Pray that He will enable me as I move towards actually teaching. Pray that He will be glorified in it all.

Some more pictures...

We got to spend a few days at the beach with a lot of the NTM missionaries in the area

I was especially blessed by the time I got to spend with Vicky! She first came here in 1980, and it was amazing to get her perspective and hear what God has done in her life.

So beautiful! My camera couldn't do it justice.

Back at the guest house for now. There are lots of roosters, and they crow all day long.

Charlotte, Sophia, Jenna, and I were reading books on the trampoline, but we took a break for this. :)

I fit so much stuff in this action packer to go to the village... this thing is deceptively large!

Loading the truck to go to the village. The rest of us will follow by helicopter!